enrollednurse/hypochondriac annie. And life, good or bad?

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02/28/2008

Not fair, my birthday.

It should be my birthday tomorrow but no, it is leap year again. I have to wait an extra day. Not fair is it?
I suppose it could have been worse. I might have been born tomorrow, the 29th.

Happy birthday to all that have a birthday tomorrow. I wonder whether next year you will have it on the 28th or like me, the 1st March. St. David's Day????

There would be a lot more candles on my cake than this, in fact the Fire Brigade would be on standby. lol

15:17 Posted in Life, good or bad? | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this | Tags: birthday, cake

02/23/2008

How I suffer!

Aches and pains. I do think it is time I retired now. Sixty four very soon and patients seem to be getting heavier. Not only that, they expect the nurse to lift them. Now we aren't supposed to lift. if we hurt ourself it is our own fault. But try telling that to someone who is very confused!!!

Maybe I am getting confused too. It's my age you know. lol.

Take care and I am still NOT smoking. Soon be five months.

23:45 Posted in Hypochondria | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this | Tags: heavy, lifting, ache, pain, age, confused

02/18/2008

Diary, part 3. Quitting the cigs.

Saturday 17 November 2007

Seven weeks. Review week. Phew! Update. Well, blow me down with a feather! Not a bad week. Still just about the same with craves. Not taking Champix now. Been off it a while. So I think, it is head down and plod on. Please keep fingers crossed for me, 40th birthday party tomorrow. This will be a test for me. (I am not 40, it's my nephew.) If I get past not even having a puff of a fag I will be so happy. I know it will be my own silly fault if I do. I thank you all for the support I have been getting. Everyone has been wonderful and supportive. Later.  I did it, I had a good few lagers, I stood with smokers, I wanted one I really did. But I DIDN'T. I honestly thought that it would be a good excuse to have the one. I really thought that I would have a fag, maybe more. I am pleased. Sunday 18 November 2007 18th Nov. 50th day. It's my 50th day without a cig. I have survived nephew's party without one too. I am pleased about that. So why, oh why do I still crave a cig? As I keep saying, they are not really bad craves. I just think of the stupid things, wish I could just have one. Still feel that there is something missing. I do keep myself busy and I'm going to work soon. Ah well, not to worry, just keeping going then shall I? Good luck fellow quitters. Wednesday 21 November 2007 21st November. Update. 22:05. My craves aren't as bad as they were. But heck, I would still love a cig. I am getting really fed up now. I think I know that I would be so upset if I had a cig now. This is my longest quit. Why do I want one? My body is now free of nicotine. I know you will say it's mind games. I know all this and wish the knowledge would help me. Just needed a little rant, not going to have a cig. Good luck everyone out there. We can and we will do it. anne. x Thanx to every one who has written to me today. I think I was being a bit sorry for myself and I thought that I was the only one that craved, although I knew I wouldn't be really but it felt like that. (Selfish woman.) Monday 26 November 2007 26th Nov. How odd. :<) Update. 27th. Really odd, I seem to be forgetting that I have stopped smoking. What I mean, I am not thinking of them and not having craves at the moment. So, that is making me feel as I am missing something. Which I am, I am not conscious of lack of the fags. I really hope this carries on. Anyone understand what I mean??? And if you do, does this pass Thinking about the cigs again, not doing anything about it. It's not too bad either. Suppose I will get these phases every so often. Doesn't seem to be a real crave like in the early days. Just strange. Never mind, as long as I don't give in eh? Just made a Christmas Cake. Saturday 01 December 2007 Nine weeks quit. Review of week. Update 2nd. Not been a bad week I suppose, I have had worse. I have got this just before midnight on the 30th so my 9 weeks will be tomorrow night, or will it??? I can't do this in 50 words and two sentences. I have had a bad shift, really fancied a cig. Didn't though. My bad times seem just before bedtime. Suppose that is good as I know that I will be in the bath and then to sleep. I do have other bad times. But nothing as bad as they were. In fact, not really bad, just quick thoughts. I really don't want to smoke again. I won't smoke again. But there is that thin line and it is still a worry at times. Would be pure stupidity if I smoked now. My weekly thanks for all the support I get. Good luck to everyone. (It is now the 1st Dec.) Now not that far off 2nd Dec. Teatime, Sunday the 2nd Dec. It's a wet, cold and a crave day today. Wonder if it's because I am bored? Work kind of annoyed me on Friday? (Not work but the one in charge!) Or is it purely a visit from Nic O Teen? I'm not sure but will be glad when it has gone. I do feel a bit selfish, other quitters have to put up with worse things. In fact, I really have nothing to worry about at the moment. But, I won't have a cig. Sorry to burden you with all this c**p.

Saturday 08 December 2007

Reviewing 10 weeks without a cig. Still can't do this in fifty words and two sentences. This last week has been the same as usual. Sorry to be negative but I still think of the cigs, I think I would still like to smoke one. It is all in my mind, I know that. I can cope with the craves ok. Just get fed up with the thoughts and the continuing craves.  I am hitting the wall about now. Yet it's not MUCH harder than it was. I wonder if because every day has been the same throughout my quit, this is the reason??? Maybe if it had been pure hell in the beginning it might be great now. Maybe I am jusy a miserable old divil and can't let go! Sad though, I get really excited to see that little red thingy at this time of the week. The one that asks me if I have had a cig. Must get out more eh? Thanks again for your support. "Old" quitters and new quitters. You are all great.

Tuesday 11 December 2007

11th Dec. Day 73. Went out and about today. Saw lady having a cig outside a cafe. Asked niece if I could join her, (lady, not niece.) Niece said no. No respect these young un's today eh? So we just had a drink and I obeyed niece. At one time I would have grabbed the opportunity with both hands and sat with the lady, on the prom, in the cold. I must be improving eh? lol Wednesday 12 December 2007 12/12/07 Just sent a thank you to *******. It made me think. (Ouch.) I am 63 going on 64. I think I am expecting more from my quit than I will get. I do know that it is one of the best things anyone can do at whatever age. But I don't think that I will ever do cartwheels and become younger looking. lol I don't think I was good at cartwheels when I was eight or nine. Never been an oilpainting either! It has made me wonder if this is why I find it hard to "let go?" So I will accept that I won't be able to climb very steep mountains and be asked to be the "face" of a famous cosmetic firm. It may help me eh?? Make it easier. Keep going lads and lasses. Thank you all for your support. Saturday 15 December 2007 Review week 11. Pleased I have got to this point as usual, just love that little flashing red light. Been a lot easier I suppose but still fancy a cig, I reckon that will last for a long time though. So at bedtime tomorrow night on the 15th Dec I won't have had a smoke for 77 days. I like to get this done early so not cheating. Busy day Saturday. Thanks everyone for your support. Well done to you all. It is not an easy job, this quitting lark is it? Yet in 14 days I will have done the 90 days. (It's not bedtime on the 15th yet.) Lots of luv and thanks.

Saturday 22 December 2007

12 weeks without. How do I feel? No different from last week really. I still think about fags regularly but the craves are not as bad. Again, thank you everyone for the support I have had. It does mean a lot. Well done fellow quitters. I am proud of you. Not an easy journey and not ended yet, will it ever be properly over I wonder? Thanks again. Thursday 27 December 2007 Sharing my story. Ok, 21st Oct.2006 I decided to stop smoking. Patches, good, but I wasn't strong enough. New Year 2007, gave up until 15th Feb. Was stupid and had 3 cigs. So it went on. Joined this site and would love to say I stopped and have never looked back! But I won't lie. What did happen was that I got a lot of support, time after time. I crept back with different names, usually got sussed though. No one judged. I tried Zyban, patches, inhalers and in the end, Champix. I still needed a lot of willpower though. I still do. Had my last cig on the 29th Sept. Now I am very nearly at the 90 day mark. I am pleased. I am not proud of myself though. I dare not be. I still think it would be nice to have a cig now and then. But I also know that it won't be now and then. I would like to quote a gentleman we all know and love, he said a cigarette was just a light at one end and an idiot at the other. (Apologies if I haven't worded that correctly.) It made me laugh but it is true. I truly wish to thank everyone who has helped me get to this point. I mean, me, after 44+ years, ciggie free for nearly 3 months! Also, I said I smoked 7 a day, that was in the late stages, used to be 20 a day. I bet it would have been back to that now. Many thanks to you all. I wish you all a very Happy 2008 Sounds like an Oscar Speech. LOL Wish I had a red carpet! Hey, you at the back, please wake up now, I've finished!!! Saturday 29 December 2007 3 months and status check 4. Well, 3 months! Quite amazing really, (for me that is.) Still fancy a cig and could have one right now. Son and granddaughter staying so the crave comes, not as often but stronger. Must be a bit of stress. I am sorry if I am not on here much to support or reply to all your lovely replies. But I do thank you all very much indeed. Computer taken over by a teenager, plus it's not good manners to sit up here while visitors downstairs. lol Both him and me have been full of cold and not feeling very well. Much better now though. This is supposed to be about strategies. I suppose my slap dash ones have worked up to now so I will carry on as I have been doing and just won't smoke. Maybe when everything is back to normal, I will be too. So I am just gonna grit my teeth and carry on. Happy New Year to everyone. Please, like me, try not to have a cig while, tiddly, drunk or anything like that. We can do it. Roll on a smokefree 2008 for us all. Wednesday 02 January 2008 2nd January. 2008. Happy New Year! Hope everyone is well. Welcome to all the new members. This quitting lark is hard work at times but it can be done. Personally I am pleased to have actually got over the holiday season where "wine, food and fags" flowed free. lol Just sister's 60th birthday bash on Saturday then back to boredomville. I will return with my homespun advice and support on Sunday. Saturday 05 January 2008 5th Jan. 2008. Update. Well, done it, got through sister's 60th without a hitch. 99 days tomorrow. I didn't think I could manage that long! Keep the chin up chucks, it does get easier. I got plenty of support from the nice, lovely people on here and they said it WOULD get easier. "Oh yes," thought me. But they were right! Monday 07 January 2008 100 days. I have actually got, (well in 34 minutes) to a hundred days without a cig!!! I am amazed. I don't get supporting letters from the site now. No flashing red light on a Friday night. I loved them when I could press on the "No I haven't had a cig" bit. I still get craves, not as intense though. But rather annoying still. Maybe I am not very confident eh? Good luck to the New Quitters. I am sure that you will succeed. But thank you everyone. Thank you so very much. Sunday 20 January 2008 20th Jan. 113 days. Update. Thoughts! I have nearly finished my one hundred and thirteenth day. Why then am I still thinking of cigs a heck of lot? Anyone know? I try and do something different and it usually works but today, for some reason it has been bad. It's not even as if I am dying for a cig. I think that is what is so annoying about it. I know that I had been smoking for years and I know that all the stuff has gone from my body, tar, nicotine and all that nasty stuff. Sorry to twitter on. I wonder if I am the only one. Most people report strong cravings every now and then. I don't get them, just this silly niggle. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. If I was still on 20 a day like I used to be, (If not more) I would have.... Saved £565. Added 17.3 days to my life and not smoked 2260 fags. I bet anything that I would have been up to 20 a day by now. Sunday 27 January 2008 4 months. Tomorrow, when I get up, I will have done 4 months without a cig. Still on my mind as I have said but the craves are ok. I just keep thinking of them. As long as that is ALL I do, it's ok. One day I will forget to remember. Thank you all for your support. You are amazing, everyone of you. Even through your bad times you have kept me and others going. Even the lapsers have got straight back onto the wagon. Wonderful. I never in a million years thought I would get this far. Thank you. Saturday 02 February 2008 2/2/08 Thank you all. 4 month plus. I would like to thank you for all the comments I received on my four month celebration! I was really touched and surprised to read all those comments. I didn't think I would get that many. Very humbling. Congratulations to everyone who has cracked it. Congratulations to everyone who is still battling. Congratulations to everyone who is thinking of quitting. Some have stayed quit through all sorts of personal ups and downs. Some have quit more than one thing too. I feel really proud of them. (Note to me, must quit troughing and lose a bit of weight. More exercise etc). The support on here is wonderful. Each and every one of you are so supportive to everyone. Please keep up the good work. Thanx again, take care and have a great weekend. This is my diary from the site...   www.stayquit.co.uk      Loads of support but for legal reasons and such I haven't published my replies on here. If this site helps one person who may read this quit, I will be happy. :<) X X X X X

16:05 Posted in Stopping Smoking. | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this | Tags: cigs, quit, diary, smoke, crave, site

02/11/2008

Diary, part two. Stopping Smoking.

Tuesday 16 October 2007

Visualising myself as a non-smoker. I still can't do this task. But am happily still not smoking. I like it too. There are times but they are getting fewer, that I do fancy a cig but can cope ok. Sorry I haven't done much on here lately, it's been all go. Take care please.   Thursday 18 October 2007 What I like about my quit. I like everything about my quit. I don't like the few craves I have though. I don't like the thought I might give in and start again. I like the thought that I won't have another cig. Saturday 20 October 2007 3rd week. Been a bit fed up really but nothing to do with cigs, just the cold weather and stuff. Cigarette wise, not bad at all, still little craves but nothing too bad.. Sunday 21 October 2007 Two weeks/ Three weeks. I have done 3 weeks of not smoking. (Not changed my quit date.) Now and then I get a little urge. But they are easily overcome. Remind myself how sick those fags made me feel 3 weeks ago. So, on to week four. Upwards and onwards. Keep it up everyone, it is hard but it's going to be worth it. Good luck. Tuesday 23 October 2007 What is success? Success to me means stopping smoking forever. Getting through the craving and all that. Not thinking of cigs. Forgetting sometimes that you ever smoked. This is what I am aiming for. Good luck to everyone in the same boat. :<) Wednesday 24 October 2007 Fine line. Advantages, money saved. Not noticed any real improvement in health except no more wheezing. (Must be my age!) I miss smoking when I get a buzz about something and sometimes after work. I still want to give up this habit. I am trying my best. I don't think anything has changed from the things I started off with. Have now changed my quit date. Well, not me but the nice people that run this site. So this is how it is now! Saturday 27 October 2007 4 weeks. I feel ok most of the time although I do get the odd crave and suppose I will for ages. Champix are working to keep me quit, I have cut down to one tablet a day. Good idea or not? The support on here helps a lot too. So thank you everyone. I am happy I have made four weeks. To be honest, it's not 4 weeks until tomorrow night but I am confident I will make it. I know I will. This always appears before midnight. The only thing that I suppose, has surprised me, is, how easy it is one day and a bit of a struggle the next. No two days the same. Sunday. Finally and officially it is four weeks now! LATER ON.................                And not a ciggie smoked. Thursday 01 November 2007 Status Check 2. UPDATE. Inhaler Tip. I am not changing much. I have stopped taking the Champix. Not had any for 3 days. But if I find myself slipping, I will go back on them again. I don't go back on the dose I finished on. Not recommended! Also, not to go back to patches or inhalers etc. But most of all, not to go back on the fags! I am going to fight this, one day, it will be easier. Some days now it's ok. 5 weeks Saturday night. Soon be weekend, hope you all enjoy it. UPDATE. Bedtime. Hope everyone is cheering up a bit. I thought I was but no. My crave is not getting any better or worse. I keep thinking it's Saturday tomorrow. But it isn't! Hee hee. Inhaler tip, just got this hint from my lady at the clinic. I haven't tried it yet. Just told Sue and wondered if it would help anyone else!  No Smoking nurse said that some people get a bit of tissue paper, apply a drop of peppermint flavouring (or anything else you fancy that tastes nice,) Place in that inhaler thingy and breathe in a nice minty taste. Not tried it yet.  Saturday 03 November 2007 Reviewing my week. UPDATE. Week five is over, not been bad really, craves often but manageable. Gone off the Champix, so now on my own. To be honest, there isn't any difference at the moment, Champix and no Champix. I believe it takes about 14 days to get out of my system so will give update. My danger point will be stupidity. At work about 8:30pm, asked friend for a fag. She popped one in my pocket. I thought that was really nice of her, (she didn't know I was still not smoking. Used to me being off the cigs then back on them. Not seen her for ages.) But I gave her it back very fast! Then, as I told Cath, I noticed it was a menthol one. Ahhhhhhhhhh. Would I have been strong enough if it had been a proper cig? I do hope so. If I fail, like every other time, I won't care for a day or two and then I will be upset with myself. I think I have the feeling that it is easier to start the quit again than carry on quitting! But I haven't had a cig and I am not going to. I just wanted to twitter on. Sorry friends. Saturday 10 November 2007 6 weeks. 11/11 Sunday. Wow. My week has been up and down and many a time I nearly never made it, sometimes I think I still could slip. Craves still come and go, no actual times for craves. I actually start day 42 / beginning of 6th week tomorrow. Will have cracked it by tomorrow night. So, head down and keep plodding on. I suppose that still not smoking is the thing that surprises me. My adjective is....weary. Thanks for all your support. I really appreciate it. It has really helped me. We will remember. 11/11 @ 11am. Wednesday 14 November 2007 I'll just have the one. I am being very negative today. I would like a ciggie. Not going to though. I will fight this. I want to fight it, I need to fight it. I am writing this just before midnight on the 13th Nov. Tomorrow will be the day I should have written it. But I want to wake up with positive thoughts. This will be the longest time without a cig for me. If I can do this long I can do it for ever! Up and onwards. Good luck everyone and many thanks for your support.

22:55 Posted in Health. | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this | Tags: cigs, quit, diary, support

02/07/2008

My Stopping Smoking Diary.

This Is the diary I have been keeping, I had my last cig on the 29th September. To all these posts I wrote, I got replies from other quitters. Saturday 06 October 2007

Support. You great guys 'n' gals. Pam....work. Julie, Stop Smoking lady. Me! Not midnight yet so not the 6th. But not far off. When midnight chimes, I am on my 7th day! (Just.) Have a good smokefree weekend please. x

Sunday 07 October 2007

My ex smoking habits. This is my 7th day of not smoking. I have not had one for a week, 168 hours if not an hour or three more by now. So, in a way, I am out of the habit. I still don't fancy a cig. I do think of them sometimes and still think there is something missing. As I had gone about 26 days without a cig and then had those 20 over 4 days, well, I think that has helped me. I am not asking for my date to be changed, I usually do and then I lapse. I thank again everyone who has given me support. Well done to all the quitters who are doing really well. New quitters, just go for it! x

Monday 08 October 2007

Quit statement. This is my statement. 8/10/2007. I won't smoke again. I have stopped. Ok, I have said this quite a few times but this time, watch this space. Now actually on 9 days and riding it out well.

Tuesday 09 October 2007

Relaxation. Read, watch TV. Walks. Computer. Dreams. Planning holidays, whether they happen or not!

Wednesday 10 October 2007

10/10.......11 days. Eleven days have passed. Passed quite well too. If I hadn't had those cigs I could have been about 37 days by now. Still, no use crying over spilt milk. It was a stupid thing to do and as I said, they tasted revolting. So I suppose 20 cigs over four days was a minor hiccup. To me anyway. I do have excuses but won't bore you with them and anyway they were excuses to excuse myself. (I know what I mean.) Lots of you are doing really well with your quits, I am really pleased. Keep it up gang.

Thursday 11 October 2007

So long Nicotine. Goodbye. Sorry to say, ( I'm not really,) you are no longer a friend or helper of mine. Off with you.

Friday 12 October 2007

Why I will not give in. I will not give in because I no longer want to be a smoker. Although I still now and then fancy a cig, the thought also makes me feel sick at times. I can't win, can I? But if I don't have a cig on the few times I fancy one, I HAVE won. Please have a good weekend.

Sunday 14 October 2007

My first / second week. I have been cig free for two weeks now. My quit date says a week. I am not resetting it as every time I do I seem to fail. It's been a funny two weeks. It's there in the background, something seems to be missing. I am on Champix so really it's a strange feeling. Anyway, upwards and onwards! Third week now just started.

19:45 Posted in Health. | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this | Tags: cigs, quit, diary

02/03/2008

Bored.

The weather remains foul, I should expect it at this time of the year I suppose.

Nothing of interest for me on TV. Never mind, got my 'puter and a few good books. I will survive. Hope you all have a good week. Please do.

I shall bore you with a few of my pics.

San Francisco.

21:20 Posted in General Chat! | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this | Tags: bored, photos, SFO.GoldenGateBridge, Morecambe

02/02/2008

I love most music.

I am partial to most music. Country is my prefered choice tonight though.

Weather not good is it? I hate heavy winds, I am a wimp as it frightens me. The louder the wind the louder the music. lol On 1st March it is the beginning of autumn or is it winter in Australia? My daffs are coming through looks as if they maybe early again this year.

I better leave the discussion of daffs, I can't think of any songs with daffs in the lyrics. A poem by William Wordsworth, yes but not a song.

 

23:30 Posted in Music | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this | Tags: music, weather, daffs